Wednesday, September 28
If you were to create the sountrack of your life, this would be the song playing when you are...
Lonely Or Down: Joni Mitchell, Case of You. I could drink a case of this blue heartbreak. And I would still be on my feet. Death Cab for Cutie, Title and Registration. It elevates my sadness to something deceptively intellectual, so parang it's cool to be sad. Hee.
In Love: Ella Fitzgerald or Frank Sinatra, I Get a Kick Out of You. Dancey, decadent and obssessive. Almost like falling in love.
Fighting With Your Significant Other: Liz Phair, Divorce Song. Still, you’ve never been a waste of my time. Hole, Violet. I told you from the start, this is how it would end.
Having Sex: Cat Power, Covers record. Wild is the Wind, Satisfaction and Naked When I Want To in torchy acoustic. I keep it under my pillow.
Nursing A Broken Heart: Tanya Donelly, Just in Case You Quit Me. I keep my heart in hinges just in case. Prefab Sprout, We Let the Stars Go. Shush.
In Need of Cheering Up: Huwag Kang Matakot, Eraserheads. Because I’ll always believe in the words of Ely Buendia. A Hiccup in Your Happiness, The Lucksmiths. Your heart will mend, if by degrees.
About To Embark On A Road Trip: Ocean Colour Scene, The Day We Caught the Train. Wooh lala. And keep the motor running. The Beatles, Two of Us.
Sunbathing On A Tropical Beach: What Will You Do When Your Suntan Fades?, Beulah. And lots of bouncy Mariah.
Feeling Groggy And Need To Wake Up: The Mamas and The Papas, I Call Your Name. Sunshiny pop hooks and they sing like angels. Like everything’s right as California rain.
Feeling Suicidal: Cueshe is the sound of contemplating suicide.
Angry, Very Angry: Foo Fighters, Best of You or the outdoors disc (disc one).
Singing At The Videoke Bar: Sugarfree. Burnout. They do have this in the videoke machine of Cable Car. O kay tagal. Din kitang. Mamahalin.
Dancing By Yourself In Your Room: “Dancing With Myself. Billy Idol. There can be only one.” – Dodo Dayao
Singing, Dancing And Drunk Off Your Ass: Oh dear. Lots. From Kellis’ Milkshake to Pedicab’s Dito Tayo sa Dilim.
Playing Air Guitar: Stone Roses, I am the Resurrection. Album version. Squire’s seven-minute solo made me want to learn to play lead. Still learning. Still listening.
Chilling On A Rainy Afternoon: Now, we’re in business. When You Were My Baby, Magnetic Fields. Citronella, The Guild League. Sparky's Dream, Teenage Fanclub. The Very Thing, Stars. 5 Verses, Jeremy Warmsley. Video, Aimee Mann. Willow, Field Mice.
Reminiscing About High School: The Alarm, Absolute Reality. Suedehead, Morrissey. Ah, the dusty streets of Recto and the sweaty afternoons spent hunting for pirated tapes in the stalls of Tandem and Ever.
Reminiscing About College: It’s a Shame About Ray, Lemonheads. Everybody Loves Me But You, Juliana Hatfield. Winter, Tori Amos. Pare Ko, Eraserheads. Watershed, Indigo Girls. We used to hang out a lot outside the university library, smoking and laughing and eating take-outs from Beach House. Maybe this is why I ended up working in a library eleven years later.
Getting Married: Yeah yeah yeahs, Maps. Perfect 10, The Beautiful South. If ever. My wedding will have distorted guitars for violins.
Saturday, September 24
Being sick gave me a lot of time to think, to dig up photos from the happy daze of ad agency Survivor island plotting and lounging, and from the bubble (College of Arts and Letter) within a bubble (U.P. Diliman) life in the university where it was romantic to feel like a chair while deconstructing Beckett on the long walk from the Faculty Center to Philcoa.
This was, roughly, a decade ago.
And generally, old + new traits, addictions, subversions, divided by years of existence, I haven't really changed.
Minus the fat and carbohydrate mood swings, and the widened vocabulary (mostly fat and carbohydrates related), and the mostly happy music swagger, yeah, not much personality alteration going on.
I finish my antibiotics cycle on Wednesday, and am excited to drink again. I miss beer so much. Missing beer sometimes, who am I kidding, oftentimes mean missing my friends. Like cocoa in chocolate, or sun in sunshine. Coffeemate in my mate.
See you all at the bar, loveys!
Friday, September 23
List seven of your favorite songs of the moment in your journal and force seven other people to repeat this process or a puppy somewhere in the world will be sad:
500 - Lush (Lovelife)
Shake, baby, shake / You know I can fit you in my arms.
At the Other End of the Telescope - Til Tuesday (Everything's Different Now) / Elvis Costello (All This Useless Beauty)
Can we agree that just this once, I'm gonna change my life / Until it's as tiny or important as you like.
14th Street - Laura Cantrell (Humming by the Flowered Vine)
I see you on the street / You kiss my cheek / My knees go weak / It's clear you've got nothing to lose / While I'm losing sleep.
Animals - The Guild League (Inner North)
We all begin with just our skin / And we live enthralled just like animals.
Saddest Quo - Pernice Brothers (Discover a Lovelier You)
Trying to be a better person / Hindsight's twenty and my visibility is worsening / All the accolades are choking / But my faith in life's unbroken.
Hollaback Girl - Gwen Stefani (Angel. Love.Music.Baby.)
This my shit.
Almost Home - The Reivers (End of the Day)
I was driving when I heard you call my name / It was not like before not quite the same / It’s too late to be much good and I might as well confess / That I have not got the nerve to borrow cigarettes /
When I’m almost with you music tries to play / When I’m almost home I almost hear you say/ It would be all right if we could run away.
Tagging Is it Safe, Single Space and Sci-Fi High (but just catch up since I know you're out of the country again, sis). Tag you! Tag you all!
Thursday, September 22
Three Names I Go By:
Three Screen Names I Have Had:
1. Mighty Thor
2. L.A. Lopez
Three Physical Things I Like About Myself:
3. Man boobs
Three Physical Things I Don't Like About Myself
1. Tummy --- Too much, too soon.
2. Ass --- or lack thereof
3. Man boobs
Three Parts of My Heritage:
1. San fernado, La Union
2. Baguio City
Three Things I Like About Myself
1. Problem solver. Rarely panics.
2. Happy with where I am, who I am, who I'm with.
3. Culinary skills.
Three Things I Don't Like About Myself
1. Verbal diarrhea. I talk too much.
2. I smoke.
3. Everything's a competition.
Three Things That Scare Me
2. My father
3. Rat piss --- `cos you can die from it, I hear
Three of My Everyday Essentials
2. Coffee in my coffee
Three of My Favorite Musical Artists:
1. The Beautiful South - Yesterday, today and tomorrow
2. Aimee Mann
3. The Guild League
Three of My Favorite Songs:
1. Animals The Guild League
2. Saddest Quo Pernice Brothers
3. I See You, You See Me The Magic Numbers
Three Things You Want In A Relationship:
2. Long drives.
3. Eating out.
Three Lies & Truths In No Particular Order:
1. I need space.
2. Tear here.
3. Best before (insert date)
1. Barya lang sa umaga.
2. Good love never dies.
3. Music makes the people come together.
Three Physical Things About The SAME Sex That Attract Me:
Three of My Favorite Hobbies:
1. Blogging --- thinking of putting up a review blog of Korean movies and tv dramas
2. Going to Quamazon
3. Checking my pores
Three Things I Want To Do Badly Now:
1. Stop coughing
2. Go home
3. Finish "Romance" (Korean drama)
Three Careers I'm Considering/I've Considered:
1. Vampire slayer
2. Starship crew
3. Fluffer (hee)
Three Places I Want To Go On Vacation:
1. Jinhae province in South Korea
2. Hong Kong Disneyland
Three Kid's Names I Like:
1. Thor (hah!)
Three Things I Want To Do before I Die:
2. Write a hit song
3. Write a novel, love story siguro with action and comedy
Three Ways I Am Stereotypically A Boy:
1. I love porn.
2. Too lazy to clean my room so everything's stacked up. High.
3. I love bullying people.
Three Ways I Am Stereotypically A Girl:
1. I read between the lines.
2. Dramarama queen. (Where were you? Why didn't you even call? Do you know him?)
3. I cry. A lot. Over TV.
Three Celebrity Crushes:
1. Kim Jae-won (Romance, 100 Days with Mr. Arrogant)
2. Kim Rae-won (Attic Cat, My Little Bride)
3. Lee Dong-gun (Lover in Paris, My Boyfriend is Type-B)
Wednesday, September 14
It feels like I should feel the years between us, the actual aging, the gained weight, the beginning creases on our foreheads, the stories told and retold.
But I don't.
It's still all new.
I still can't wait to see him on Saturdays. I still get a little lonely when the weekday begins.
His smile still surprises me.
Thursday, September 1
Who hasn't become a walking passive-agressive mess who shifts from insecure to defensive in a five-word sentence because s/he just wants to get it on dammit with a wealthy, arrogant, gambling, wine-swigging, pretty boy asshole?
So homely Jung-Eun takes in on-the-run petty gambler Kyung-Min because he is hot and has a really nice charcoal gray luggage. They have sex on the second night of living together, and with all the pouncing and the screeching and the biting, it's no wonder they called this Show "Attic Cat." No, not really. Kyung-Min likes this other wealthy, arrogant, gambling, wine-swigging, pretty girl, but Jung-Eun still lets him stay with her because she's fallen in love with his wicked ways. Aww. So now she goes around telling everyone that she has a cat to explain the noises like banging doors and cabinets because cats just love doing that and why she can't stay out late.
By episode 3, I was hooked. The wit's quick, the cat fights are involving in a WWF way but with less grunting, the heart break is unusually calm, like those few seconds before an accident.
I tried watching local TV just a couple of nights ago. And everything's a fucking rip-off in a really obvious ABBA Teens way. "Sugo" is really my-favorite-scenes-from-The-Matrix. "Kampanerang Kuba" tries to be original but it's so bad that regular bad is good. The show's Disney-ish song numbers is katu-corny; it feels like GMA Supershow all over again. "Encantadia" is just lost in its own maze of a plot and "Darna" has become too predictable. Having just borrowed from Buffy's "Hush" episode, it's just sayang that they end a good plot with a badly-executed fight scene.
So. Pinoy Big Brother, anyone? I like Uma. He's cute and bastos. Yay.