Wednesday, January 12

The F Word (Warning: Contains Language)

Fidelity.

Oh dear. Over lunch today, the two Ms and I couldn't agree on the boundaries of in/fidelity. Is a one-night stand un/forgiveable? Is a two-year affair a necessary evil in a relationship rut? Is the winning over a prerequisite of the moving on?

Physical infidelity is so much like the common old with its many episodic mutations and prescribed remedies. A blow job for a blow job. A farewell fuck for a grudge fuck. Honesty is usually the most recommended cure-all, but honestly, I'd rather not know. If it's just an itch that needs scratching or a scrape that needs soothing, then nevermind. It is the knowledge that hurts, the knowledge that leads to a feeling of betrayal. Of not being good enough.

I'm not the type who needs to be won over. If my partner needs to be in love with someone else for a couple of weeks, months or years to be able to appreciate what we have, then adios. Really. I won't entertain a nanosecond of win-me-back pleas.

It only takes a maximum of 45 minutes or less. Quick fucks are quick fixes. If it takes more than that, then you are trying to hurt someone.

1 comment:

spidergrrl said...

"It is the knowledge that hurts, the knowledge that leads to a feeling of betrayal. Of not being good enough."

I know *exactly* how this feels. Oh God, how I know it.

Hi sweetie.