Wednesday, February 15


Toxic 1: Sta. Lucia Clinic. Like purgatory. Waiting is eternity.

W and I arrived at 1:00 p.m. for a 1:30 appointment. It hadn't been a restful weekend. W's blood analysis results were due Sunday but the doctor wasn't in. So we went to the clinic a little early on a weekday, minus lunch. As Tara would say, mammoths in the stomach. Hurling was not an option. At 1:45, W asked the front desk if the doctor was in. She was on a lunch break. She came in at 2 but was nowhere to be found. She started calling in patients at 2:30, but W's appointment was moved (our first number said #2), and moved, until we were 4th. We bitched at the receptionist who was just shrugging most of the time. All the managers were in a meeting. So fuck it. And a fuck you all!!!!!! I curse you long lines wherever you go. Bathroom lines like a Neil Gaiman book signing! May you all pee and shit in your pants. At the same time!

We waited our turn.

Toxic 2: The Doctor is out of her head.

She starts with, Yes, you have diabetes. And then...
Dr.: You see, our body is like the Philippines.
Us: (Whathafuck?)
Dr.: Our main produce is ...?
Us: (Whathafuck?)
Dr.: Rice. And when we run out of rice, what do we do? What do we do?
Us: (Dance?)
Dr.: We IMPORT! Similarly, when our body can't produce insulin, we?
Us: (We're fucked.)

Toxic 3: Where W calls me and says he's listening to Sugarfree.

I wish I could say, Lights will guide you home and ignite your bones, And I will try to fix you. I wish I could sing it and make him feel better. And it hurts me to see him put up a brave front for me. But he is brave. And all would be better. We were watching My Name is Kim Sam Soon last night, and Sam Soon, while applying for a job as a baker says, "The chocolates in my box aren't all sweet. At my age, I'm just hoping that I've finished up most of the bitter." But the bitter ones have less sugar, so from now on, bitter is good.

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